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Description of one of my Nightmares: I do not make any Difference to this World

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At 2016_09 I'm 35 years old, at least if my calculations are correct. I'm born 1981_08_05. I do not consider 35 years of age to be young, but I do not consider it to be old either. Essentially the nightmare that I have had from time to time was that I as an old man, may …